Have you ever tried having a conversation with somebody where you didn’t really hear what the other person was saying? Perhaps you were caught up in a negative emotional state or you were ruminating about a coincidence that happened earlier that day.
I know I have – and many of us experience disconnection if we don’t make a conscious effort to be present.
I have developed a small ritual to help me get into an open an expanded state before facilitating TeamUp Triad Coaching sessions. I take a moment to find stillness, sit down and notice what is happening inside on a feeling level. Maybe I’ve just received some bad news that is still lingering on in my mind, or I might feel agitated and unproductive and this will make me feel contracted.
When we are contracted it is difficult to have a genuine connected conversation with another person. We are simply not that open to hearing what the other person is saying, and on a more subtle level we can’t receive their non-verbal communication, and pick up what they are feeling.
I take some deep breaths, which helps me open up and release whatever contraction I feel in the mind and body. I then visualize each of the participants and allow myself to feel a sense of genuine care, curiosity and compassion for them. By doing this I arrive in myself, I feel expanded, present and ready to start the session.
In the following video, Brian explains how he creates expansion before meeting someone.
TRY IT OUT! Whenever you are about to engage with someone else, you can take a moment beforehand and ask yourself “Am I in an expanded or a contracted state?” If you are feeling contracted take a deep breath, expand your belly, lower ribs and chest area as much as possible and exhale profoundly while relaxing all your muscles and making the sound: Aaaaahhhhh! This will help you release the contraction and come back to an expanded state.
In the comments below I would love to hear if you are feeling expanded or contracted if you check in right now?
Co-founder of TeamUp
TeamUp Coaching is a revolutionary and affordable coaching approach that enables you to create better relationships, enhance your career, and live a deeper, more meaningful life.
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